Winter wander within
lingering under the skin
swimming through cells
diving down pipelines
descending,
deep-seeding
depths of being
into this body
down and around
expanding inside out
and the more inward my gaze
the thinner the armor
wielded to the world
in the edgeless war
of us against them
fending off courage and peace,
fueling the fearful beast
that lines our battle coats
fighting for our suffering
raging
to stay caged
afraid
curling in,
hiding our sins
building this fortress
of fear
of the other
the unknown
of those not yet grown into shadows
of samskaras
living for tomorrow
grieving from our sorrows
of a lost yesterday
my warrior goddess slain
heart humming in pain
blood staining the stone
I lost you, yesterday,
and today, I relive the losing,
the bereavement, bereft of you
searching for that small child, young girl
furled in my womb
tomblike
and
I’m here
in this cave of consciousness
huge nude caverns
arched above and around me,
echoing in loss
engulfed in silence
timeless space housed
with just enough light
to know darkness
and I
take my seat
still
listening for her
for you
for my warrior goddess
to arise
from inside
me
